


The Ascent Rewrite

by cool_ha_ha



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Episode: s05e09 The Ascent, Masturbation, Screenplay/Script Format, Sexual Frustration, cant humanoid, odo and quark have a truce
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:00:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23153650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cool_ha_ha/pseuds/cool_ha_ha
Summary: What if Quark and Odo would have just been nice to each other on the mountain. How is Odo coping with being a person? Why did no one tell him about puberty?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	1. an intimate conversation

**Author's Note:**

> Q- Quark  
> O- Odo  
> G- Garak

Q and O are a few days into their journey. Their reason for being on the mountain were caused by both of them. Both are seriously pissed.  
O: So you're telling me, you were going to testify against the orion syndicate?  
Q: I can’t believe you took so much pleasure in dragging me aboard that doomed transport.  
O: It wouldn't have been doomed if you hadn't been a criminal  
Q: It wouldn't have mattered if your team would have checked the ship for dangerous items  
O: Which was there because you can't be a decent person!  
Q: You know what, I'm tired of this. I'm tired of arguing. I'm tired of fighting you on things that will never change. You're gonna live forever, I’ve got hundreds of years to go before I die of natural causes-  
O scoffs  
Q: THAT is exactly what im talking about. We could do this forever, but right now, our lives are on the line and our priority is hurting each other. Rule of acquisition 76. Declare peace every once in a while.  
O: It confuses the hell out of your enemies. Alright. Cease fire until we get help.  
Q puts his hand out for a deal. O complies.  
Q: Since were on good terms, can I ask about your new form?  
O: Go for it.  
They both keep walking  
Q: How many times have you visited the infirmary?  
O: Too many  
...  
O: Why do you run a bar?  
Q: I’m a social creature. I can't stand being alone  
…  
Q: How's the K thing going?  
O: Bad. She keeps getting new boy friends  
…  
O: What the thing with you people and bugs?  
Q: Our ancestors lived off them because they're so plentiful on Ferenginar. We started farming them and well ..  
…  
It's been a few days and both of them are running out of small talk.  
Q: I know you're not happy with your peoples decision-  
O: That's an understatement  
Q: But, surely you've enjoyed some of it?  
O: Like what?  
Q: Eating? Sleep? You know .. more personal matters?  
O: No actually. I- I haven't got there yet  
Q: You’ve been a person for over a month and your not even curious?  
O: Of course I’m curious. I'm just a bit uncomfortable with it.  
Q: For the rest of us, your pubescent urges cancel out those feelings  
O: Unlucky me. I missed that part.  
Q: You know what I mean. It's your body, you do what you want with it, but it’ll change your life.  
O: Stop me if this is a stupid question, but how do you know what to do?  
Q: You don't. Just like all skills, it's a matter of trial, error and gossip.  
O: You've lost me.  
Q: You hear someone describe something. You try. It either works or it doesn't. Then you listen for more advice.  
O: Still a little vague  
Q: For most young Ferengi boys, it starts after their third ears. They get sensitive and they exploit that.  
O: Oo-max  
Q: From there, it becomes a matter of preference. You figure out what you like. Who you like.  
O: What about non Ferengi.  
Q: Vulcans are not allowed emotion so they figure it out with biology and logic. Klingons get excited by all sorts. Culture. Violence. Music. Cardassians drink kanar and argue their way into the bedroom.  
O: Bajorans?  
Q: Can’t help ya there. Never been with a humon either, so I don't know.  
O: Thank you anyway.  
Q takes a moment.  
Q: Do you people dream?  
O: I do now. Why?  
Q starts to laugh  
Q: Keep an eye on your bed sheets, if we make it off this rock.  
O: I don’t get it.  
Q: Not yet you don't. God, It’s like talking to a teenager  
O looks scared.

Its night and Q is sock on. O sits on the edge of the cliff looking out past the moon. His mind sits with K and his fear of their possible relationship. So many questions. His curiosity had been growing ever further since Q mentioned it. He suddenly becomes uncomfortable and crosses his legs. He started breathing heavily and makes it worse. In his panic he decides to move away from Q just in case. There is a bigger ridge just a little further up the mountain. He promises he's not going too far away, but far enough that he feels more alone.

Q is still asleep when O looks over the ledge. It's very cold but O seems to be warming up.   
O: Trial and error. What do you like? Who do you like?  
K passes through his mind again. He is kneeling with his back as close to the cliff wall as he can get without feeling trapped. His mind wanders and his hand does too. He becomes very tense. It's a new mixture of feelings. Excited but scared. Relaxed but uncomfortable. He is tired from the trek today but he can't keep his mind away from the subject. 

O: You don't have to do anything. You're just figuring things out.   
His hands under the sheet he is wearing are still cold but a lot warmer than the rest of him. He puts his hands over his lap.  
O: It's supposed to be sensitive.   
The feeling of shame is fighting with his new urge.   
O: ...Nope.  
He removes his hands and stands up. He shuffles back down the slope to where Q is still asleep. O lays down and continues to stare at the sky.

O is shocked awake by Q.  
O: What happened to the truce.  
Q: I’m not the one sleeping in ‘til noon.  
O scrambles up and Q picks up the machine. As Q walks off, O is sure somethings not right. He stops and is embarrassed to realise what's happened to him. He's not sure what to do.  
O: Q!   
Q: It's normal O. You don't have to talk about it, but it's normal.  
O has yet more questions.


	2. finding a solution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Odo is not coping with biology right now.

Weeks later  
O sat in his quarters. He has feared picking one of his romantic crime novels up since the accident. He hasn't mentioned it to anyone else. He takes a deep breath and picks it up. He flicks to where he left off.   
The story gets heated and he gets invested in it. Once again shame hits him before he gets anywhere and puts the book back down. He doesn't want to talk to Q again. B would probably look at this from a medical point of view. Cant talk to the women of the crew.   
O: O to G  
G: G here  
O: Do you have a minute?  
G: Depends?  
O: Call it .. gossip.  
G: I’ll bring tea.

G and O are sat with hot cups on O’s couch.  
G: It looks different in here since you put your shapeshifting stuff away.  
O: I'm still getting used to it. In Fact … that's actually why I brought you here.  
G: not coping well?  
O: I need very blunt advice  
G: You've picked the station's most well known liar for blunt advice?You must be desperate.  
O: I am. There's no subtle way to put it. I think I'm frustrated  
G: frustrated? … oh. OH  
O: I don't know how to stop it.  
G: You’re right. This is going to be very blunt. O, have you ever been with anyone?  
O: No.  
G: Have you ever .. finished on your own?  
O: Finished what?  
G: And this has been building since you turned ..  
O: Yes.  
G: How far have you gotten?  
O: I get excited. I think about things. Then I get scared and abandon ship.  
G: So its psychological?  
O: It’s more emotional. It feels wrong.  
G: But you know it's not?  
O: Yes.  
G: We need to get you past that mental block. Would you consider a holosuit?  
O: No.   
G: What about toys?  
O looks confused.  
G: I'm going to bring you a book and a box of things to try. Give me a moment.

G returns with a small box and a pad on top of it.  
G: The book is advice across different races. I don't know what your biology is and I don't need to know.  
O picks up the book.  
G: The box is equipment that should provoke sensations louder than doubt.  
O: Theres a lot of things in here  
G: O, I’ve been an undercover agent most of my life. Worse yet, I'm a gay Cardassian. These are things I’ve enjoyed and replicated for you. Enjoy.  
G leaves and O starts reading. There's a lot of pictures. 

The next morning O wanders into G’s shop.  
G: Wasn't expecting to see you so soon  
O: I thought I'd visit and say thank you.  
G: did any of it help?  
O: Not all of it, but there were a few items that …  
G: What about the book?  
O: Very helpful. I wish I'd have known about it when I could shapeshift.  
G: Why?  
O: I had a few ideas.  
G: I’m curious  
O: Not here. I just wanted to say I feel alot better, and thank you for .. understanding my predicament.  
G: We’ve all been there. Maybe one day, you will enjoy these experiences with someone else?  
There is a moment of silence  
O: Which brings me to another question. How often should I be able to .. finish?  
G: Depends how quickly those feelings come back. Did you want the follow up book to the one I gave you?  
O: There's more?  
G: I’ll just send you the set.


End file.
